Stones and Arrows

Hamlet is speaking, considering whether to take his own life, and this phrase pops on the radar not far after “To be, or not to be, that is the question.” But “stones and arrows” describe the harsh response from others who criticize us. Maybe they are things that happen regardless of whose fault it is.

I’m no superhero, and I have no superpower, but I’ve learned to turn on my “rhino skin” when someone decides it’s time to send some slings and arrows my way. This is probably the same skin that politicians have. Wait! Maybe I don’t want to be in that same boat of thought! After all, I do have feelings. My skin isn’t so thick that others cannot affect me personally.

Dig into your memory banks of playground antics. Kids are easily some of the harshest critics of each other. We fling stones and barbs of a time long ago, and we find comfort in these sayings that are protecting us…at least on the outside.

I’m rubber. You’re Glue.
What you say bounces off me and sticks on you.

Sticks and stones may break my bones
but words will never hurt me.

We carry the wounds of stones and arrows inside. Outside? We may look and act tough, but we nurture the hurt and let it fester on the inside.

How do I know this? I still have some messages from those who sent a bevy of stones. A quiver full of those collected arrows stands in the closet of my mind. Seldom do I review them. Even more rarely do I use them as ammunition. I think.

The Reality

The reality? We are affected by what others say, how they say it, and the timing of the word’s arrivals. Whether real or perceived, stones and arrows pierce our lives. The wounds are real. They take a long time to heal. If they ever do.

I was sitting in a meeting a decade of years ago. When I tried to give input, the discussion moderator told me “hush” in his “polite” way. Shut down. I felt devalued. Hence, why get involved? The Reality? I still remember this. Bows and slings send forth arrows and stones. Stored. They become ammunition for the future. In fact, I’m using some of them right now!

Ah-ha… The truth is out. What you receive, you quickly give. Receive hurtful moments, and you are most apt to be the giver of hurt in return. What’s that saying? Those abused become abusers?

Of a truth, it’s easier to say “forgive and forget” than it is to do it! #Thimk

It doesn’t have to be that way. When you recognize the flow, you can change your practices.

And do not be conformed to this world,
but be transformed by the renewing of your mind,
that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.
Romans 12:2 NKJV

What’s your reality?