Middle of a restless night.
Wide awake an hour after midnight.
Tossing. Turning.
I fake my anger…go back to sleep, I said.
I did, yet, still restless.
A word, phrase, and thought popped into my mind in the middle of the night. I carried it all night long. Since it’s my answer to a prayer I prayed years ago for something fresh, I sit down to think it through.
Thinly Veiled.
My typical routine goes something like this.
First, define. “: able to be seen or understood but not openly shown or stated: expressed in a way that is not clear and direct.”
Second, scope it out. This could be used with any combination of words describing something a reader or listener will understand, but it’s not stated in an obvious manner.
Third. Use the idea in a thought and construct a sentence.
- She looked at him with barely veiled contempt.
- With disdain, he understood the words to mean a thinly veiled threat.
- Other groups even issued thinly veiled threats of legal action.
Now, I ask why this word or phrase popped into my mind.
The past few weeks have been strangely weird—health, family, function, schedule, people, words, threats. One can feel lost and not know why. With current heel pain, every step is planned before taking, and every move works to consolidate the trips from here to there. My heel used to allow me to swivel quickly. Not now!
Isn’t life supposed to slow down as we age? Not in my world.
I could name everything I’m sensing, but the timing and combination make life strange. Every decision is second-guessed, and each weighted problem seems to add a load impossible for anyone to carry. The decision tree looks like a messy root ball of a plant growing in too small a space. It’s challenging to unravel the intertwined threads of decisions. Every decision wants to trip your momentum.
Suddenly, I realize. Life proposes a thinly veiled attempt to create a stumble and great fall.
Is that the key? Perhaps. I’ve had some challenges in life where I failed, but I didn’t stay down. I get back into the fight, race, or whatever the moment demanded. My personality is to not go down without a fight, but when I’m down, I fight to get back up. (Come on, sing some Frank Sinatra with me!)
For a righteous man may fall seven times
And rise again, But the wicked shall fall by calamity.
(Proverbs 24:16 NKJV)
I beseech you therefore, brethren, by the mercies of God,
that you present your bodies a living sacrifice, holy, acceptable to God,
which is your reasonable service.
And do not be conformed to this world,
but be transformed by the renewing of your mind,
that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.
(Romans 12:1-2 NKJV)
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