It’s often been said you get to choose your friends, but your family is thrust upon you whether you like them or not. It’s perfectly fine to enjoy your family as you do your friends, but from neither group should you find it easy to walk away from their connection. Friends can be closer than a brother, and it’s true the Bible teaches us that a neighbor is better than a brother that is far away (Proverbs 27:10)
Solomon, perhaps because of his wisdom and position, probably found it difficult to have a friend, and maybe he yearned for the friendship as his father, David, had with Jonathan. Read his wisdom in Proverbs 17:17, 18:24. Yes. Wisdom. His advice has been around for thousands of years and we still use it today.
We stood at the fence this week and got to know our new neighbors. Where they are new to the neighborhood and yearning to meet everyone, we’ve been here for 19 years and seemingly take our acreage distance for granted. It keeps us at arm’s length, true, but those who join our fence line are the neighbors we would call on should we need anything, but we are surrounded by good people one and all!
One is good and quick to bring his chainsaw over, the other offers his craftsman experience, and the ones behind us often brought us some produce from their Garden before the fence was put up.
Family and Friends
Family and friends, one you own, the other you choose
Both are the staying power of our lives.
They are there for your life’s events
Both major, minor, and all in between
So should you be there for them
They are even there to play a game in the parlor
Crying Rummy, Texas 42, even a boxed game from the store
A shared meal, laughter, tears, and all the emotions in between
If you reach a time of life where and when you have neither
Your lowest of times can be lifted and blessed
It’s very simple, and we know this to be the truth:
Be a friend, make a friend
They fill in the gaps of family here and there
Perhaps the hardest task is in the making
But being that friend will be easier than making
My brother has been here several times helping me with projects I wouldn’t dream of doing on my own. My youngest brother has been here and preached for our 10th anniversary of pastoring. Before losing my sister, she loved to come and hang out. I made music playlists for us to listen to on our drives. Mom and Dad stayed with us for a while, and both of our kids made this space their home at needful times.
Along the way, many will swing by, and we’ll enjoy the memories as we head into the sunset.
The Times Will Come
The times will come, as you age and your family and friends fade into their own sunset, you may face the hardest of years. Across the Miles and Through the Years, you will add and subtract, your cornucopia of connections will come and go. Ebb and Flow. Here, this year, and gone, suddenly, quickly. Memories remain like the taste of that favored dish of years gone by. Pangs of sorrow, are overflowed by the joy of memories made.
Feel-good stories of the positive news type found in a morning reading brought this thought to light. I’m getting more and more sentimental as I age. That’s a good thing. Tears creep in when I get to enjoy a memory of you.
What could you add to this list that maybe I’ve missed? I’m interested in hearing from you.
Family and Friends – how to nurture, keep and grow your connections.
- Never hang onto the grudges or frustrations of the past. Life teaches me that we all change, and who/what we were in history, is not the final tale of our lives written in the future.
- Always be there even when the times are far from perfect.
- Be the first to reach out, and never let it be said of you, “You never call me anymore.”
- The generosity of the heart grows the branches of connection than can seldom be broken. You will need it sooner or later, you may as well nurture it today.
- Be the one that is quick to forgive. No angst can be undone without first someone saying “I’m sorry. Forgive me. How can I undo the wrong?” Show others how it is done!
- Be intentional with your connections. Do not let the connections fade by accident.