Printer Letters Leadset
Finding Our Love Language

Valentine… It’s not a “holy” day, so it’s not a “holi-day.” It’s the idea that we should shower the one we love with calories, expensive baubles, or tear-jerker cards. Who gets rich from this? The retailers and production companies. They think they have a handle on the “language of love,” so they get to tell us what to buy, say, and how to celebrate.

America will spend 24 billion planned dollars on this special day in the USA. That’s $73 for every man, woman, and child – no matter who you are… If I’m spending $73 and getting $73, why not let me keep mine, and I’ll decide! I’ll give you the additional 364 days, which means more to me!

My bride gives me a Thumbs Up!

These statistics often make me wonder if we truly know what “love” is. Twenty-four billion is a lot of money for a single day that’s not a holiday. Multiply by 10, and you get the amount spent on Christmas last year – 226 billion. So. Where do we LOVE the most?

Remember the five love languages of Gary Chapman’s book: words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch.

My Love Language is Quality Time…others can have the words.
Some require gifts; oh
my, let’s hope they can give as well as receive.
Some want to be waited on, so show what you want by doing for others.
Still, some want that lingering touch that goes on and on.

The problem? Most of us have a hard time saying the word “Love” because the term has become so polluted! It’s been twisted to mean much more and less than we wish to use with our true love.

Our personal love language revolves around what we can give and receive and feel the satisfaction of Love. It should always include language.

What if we could unjumble all the symbolism, words, and language? Why? To understand the Greatest Love ever known to us. In other words, what if we could decipher God’s Love Language?

God’s Love Language

The Apostle Paul joins three words together to talk about God and us in seven different locations. Faith, Hope, and Love. The Love Chapter (1 Corinthians 13) tells us Love is the most important of the three. But take a look at his words to Thessalonica.

“…remembering without ceasing your
work of Faith, labor of love, and patience of Hope
in our Lord Jesus Christ in the sight of our God and Father”
~1 Thessalonians 1:3

Faith is associated with working, and at the opposite end of the spectrum, Hope is associated with patience. Nestled between the two is Love. The Greek word for “labor” means striking or beating (I’m thinking of a forge worker preparing metal for its final product). It’s not just the work as he described Faith. It’s Hard Work!

Love is Hard Work!

Love might mean one thing in action and a different thing in response. We do because we love, but we must learn to respond when the corresponding actions do not speak the language we seek.

Learning the language of Love can be difficult.

The Language of Love: Love might mean one thing in action and a different thing in response. We do because we love, but we must learn to respond when the corresponding actions do not speak the language we seek. Share on X

Throughout the Bible, we find references to God’s love for us. He tells us how to respond with our love through our actions. Actions equal Love. Maybe the key relates to our actions that come from love, and not that love requires us to do certain things.

My bride sits with our eight German Shepherd puppies at the end of the day. She lulls them to rest and then to sleep by singing one song line to them. “Go to sleep, you little babies.” The lilt and timbre of her voice are calming. One by one, they drift off.

Could it be this represents the Language of God’s Love to us? The prophet Zephaniah gives the Word from the Lord to Israel.

The LORD your God in your midst, The Mighty One, will save;
He will rejoice over you with gladness,
He will quiet you with His love,
He will rejoice over you with singing.”
Zephaniah 3:17 NKJV

Each translation of the original words adjusts the meaning to their interpretation. Notice the middle line. He will quiet you with His love. Translations vary this with phrases like: “he will rest in his love, love you with silence, or he will renew you with his love.”

Accept any or all. But I love the NKJV that says he will “quiet you with His Love.” Soothing after the battle for the body, soul, and mind. Calming when everything else is in turmoil. Jesus said he would give us Peace. (John 14:27) But he said this just after describing how we will keep his word if we love him.

Love and Peace. Hmmm. Hippy movement from the ’60s. Flashback!

Love Requires Action

Throughout the Bible, we find how much God loves. Sometimes love requires admonitions and punishment. Maybe we call it Tough Love. Other times it’s the comfort of simply resting in the presence of the other. It’s sort of like the concept of “hand in glove.” The hand and the glove belong to him, and I’m just trying to fit in. Let me find my place, space, and timing. I want to be part of and not separate from His Love.

My action keeps me on the watch for a false love. Fakery. Destructive.

The thief does not come except to steal, and to kill, and to destroy.
I have come that they may have life, and that they may have it more abundantly.
John 10:10 NKJV

If He brings us life, He knows the false and the fake, the destructive and unkind. If you could think of His love in abundance, you would understand there is nothing against that which a thief can never remove. Once you have True Love, you never want to let it go.

So. Let’s build up our Love with Solid Action, and we will find His Love in Abundance! (John 14:15, 1 John 3:18, Philippians 3:21, James 1:22)

Essentially, Love is Doing. This will include “saying, acting, living, and showing….” He’s busy showing us his love. Let’s get busy and respond appropriately!

By Michael Gurley

Making Sense of Life, One Thought at a Time!